“The Necessity of Imperfect Community” by Angelina Stanford

The Enlightenment has us all obsessed with creating the perfect environment for us to achieve our potential. But maybe our obsession is making it harder for us.

And all too often we want a community that places no demands on us. And we often want the same thing in a church community too. We want love and acceptance but we don’t want the hard stuff that comes with that.

And there is a certain artificiality in modern ‘community’ too. We call our clubs of like-minded people our community, but I’ve been thinking lately that there has to be a sense in which we don’t choose the community. Like our families, which is the first community that disappoints us. And because we don’t choose it, we can’t be consumers about it. Always shopping for the community with the right fit–the perfect one.

Read the rest here:

“The Necessity of Imperfect Community” by Angelina Stanford


“What Does It Mean To Be The Head Of The Home” by John Macarthur

Here on The Lydia Center Blog we’ve been walking through a teaching series from Grace to You called: “God’s Design For The Family.” In this post, Pastor John Macarthur builds on the foundational idea of marriage as a union in which there is mutuality to describe the nature of the husbands headship over his wife.

Scripture makes it perfectly clear that men and women are spiritual equals in the sight of God. They have an equal standing in Christ and equal spiritual privileges, because we are all united with Him in the same way. Galatians 3:28 says, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” There is no second-class spiritual citizenship. In Christ and before God, there’s only oneness. We are equal. Men are not spiritually superior to women.

It’s nonetheless true (and perfectly obvious) that both Scripture and nature assign different roles and different functions to men and women. The Bible is quite clear in assigning headship in every family to the husband, not the wife (Ephesians 5:23). The responsibilities of teaching and leading the church are given to men, not women (1 Timothy 2:12). But women are uniquely and exclusively equipped to bear and nurture young children, and the fulfillment of that role assures that they can never be relegated to any second-class status.

Men are, as a rule, physically stronger (1 Peter 3:7 NKJV refers to the wife as “the weaker vessel”). Men are therefore responsible to carry the weight and the brunt of labor in order to provide for and protect the family. Scripture teaches that God designed the physical differences and the functional differences between men and women for a purpose—and that is why God clearly distinguishes the roles and responsibilities of husbands and wives.

Remember, however, that while their roles are clearly different, the spiritual standing of men and women in Christ is perfectly equal. Even the biblical language of two becoming one flesh underscores the essential oneness of husband and wife in a way that rules out the very notion of inequality.

As the article goes on, Macarthur demonstrates from Scripture that the relationship of headship is modeled after the Father’s headship of Christ and Christ’s headship of the church:

First, God has given every husband a clear responsibility for spiritual leadership, and men dare not abdicate that duty. The husband, not the wife, is to be head of the family. That is God’s design. Within every home, someone must ultimately have the responsibility of leadership, and Scripture unambiguously assigns that duty to men, not women.

Second, the model for the husband’s headship is Christ. Christlike headship involves not only authority for spiritual leadership, but also the duties of care, nurture, protection, and self-sacrifice. In the words of Ephesians 5:28–29,

Husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church.

Read the full article here: What does it mean to be the head of the home?

“Submission Isn’t a One-Way Street” by John MacArthur


Christlikeness is the principle of all human holiness. In him by creation, we live and move and have our being. In him by spiritual rescue and renewal, we being transformed by the grace of the Spirit to more and more reflect his image.

In the home this beautiful reality is expressed in mutual submission. The undergirding reality of all of our thoughts, words, and actions toward each other ought to be mutual service out of self-sacrificing love. While this is not opposed to authority and submission, it is radically different than a fleshly, ungodly version of leadership. In the family the sweet savor of Jesus Christ ought to be present in all of our relationships.

The good news is that this is his promise to us and our children! Believe it! Live out of it!

“And as for me, this is my covenant with them,” says the LORD: “My Spirit that is upon you, and my words that I have put in your mouth, shall not depart out of your mouth, or out of the mouth of your offspring, or out of the mouth of your children’s offspring,” says the LORD, “from this time forth and forevermore.” Isaiah 59:21 ESV

John MacArther writes:

In the end, everyone in the household has a duty to submit at some point and in some specific way to everyone else. Yes, wives must submit to the leadership of their husbands. But husbands also must bow to the needs of their wives. Certainly children need to obey their parents. But parents also have a duty to serve and sacrifice for their children. Of course servants need to yield to the authority of their masters. But masters also are commanded to treat their servants with dignity and respect—esteeming even the lowliest servant better than themselves.

In other words, Paul commanded each Christian to be an example of submission and service to all others. That simple principle is the key to harmony and happiness in the home. Domineering men who try to use Ephesians 5 as a club to keep their wives in a kind of servile submission have missed the whole point of the passage. Even if God has given you a position of leadership, you have a duty to take the role of a servant—because that is precisely what Christ did for us.

The full article from GTY here: Submission Isn’t a One Way Street


Living Sacrifice by Danielle Pollock

Singleness as a vocation? Danielle Pollock at Torrey Gazette says yes, and sex or rather the lack thereof is part of its experience. 

…I’m vocationally single, and celibate, by God’s grace alone, through no power of my own. There’s a hell of a lot more to the vocation of singleness than just NOT HAVING

Her post is full of hard-earned insights for Christians who are unmarried (and for those who aren’t!) Of all people, Christians ought to be the most understanding and kind, saved by grace and all. Yet, we often are unkind to single people in our churches and place hurtful pressures on them. At the same time, for those who are single, there is often both a longing to be married and difficulty living out their lives without the support and companionship of marriage.
Don’t miss her story. It’s insightful and encouraging: Living Sacrifice by Danielle Pollock

“Don’t Worry” by Nancy Wilson

From Nancy Wilson at Femina:

We are all probably pretty familiar with Jesus’ teaching on worry in the Sermon on the Mount. We are not to worry about our life, our food, our drink, our clothes, or tomorrow (Matthew 6:25-34). That covers just about everything that we can worry about. But being familiar with the teaching is not the same thing as obeying the teaching. That’s the hard part.

Read the rest at: “Don’t Worry”

“Mutual Submission” by John MacArthur


Order and unity. Submission and equality. Difference and similarity. These are what theologians call antinomies: two things that appear to contradict, but actually do not, yet are difficult to hold together.

In Christian marriage this theological problem is painfully practical: men and women are not the same, but they are. Marriage is a relationship of authority and even obedience (1 Peter 3:6), yet it is also a relationship of mutual submission and mutual service. For the Christian, all of these things come together in seeking Christ-likeness. The more you and I are like Jesus the more these antinomies will not become contradictions!

John MacArther writes:

…when it comes to one-on-one interpersonal relationships within all those institutions, the principle of mutual submission must govern how each of us treats one another. Even the person in a position of authority must be Christlike in his or her dealings with all others—which, of course, still means esteeming others better than self. Again, Christ Himself is the model for what that kind of leadership looks like. “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45).

Mutual submission is the principle, then, that Ephesians 5:21 spells out: “Be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.” To illustrate and further explain how the principle of submission is supposed to work in the framework of institutions where God has ordained authorities for leadership, Paul turned to the most fundamental of all human institutions, the family.

The full article from GTY here: Mutual Submission